So after monkeying with my AV for about an 2 hours, i find out that it was ignoring my Files and folders that i had set as trusted and as exceptions. and that my AV still runs even when the AV process is ended and was still blocking it when i turned off the fire wall and everything else that it has to off.
finally decided to just uninstall the AV just to see and that's when it finally stopped freezing and updated properly so then i tried reinstalling the AV and setting everything up as trusted and exceptions again and it finally started listening to them. so its most likely fully fixed now i will let you know if the other issue happens again after an update but i don't think it will now that the AV is actually working properly after reinstalling it, thank you for the help.
I didn't think it was the AV at first because i had tested if it was and was not showing that it had blocked anything and the AV was set up the exact same way as my laptop which my laptop still worked just fine with the game and updating. but looks like the AV was just bugging out hardcore... Super annoyed with my AV right now lol it was even the first thing i checked when i got the first issue.